There is some mystery about when and where Dj Kim Jong Ill Beats was born. Some reports indicate that he was born in 1941 in Siberia while his father was exiled during the Dance Dance Revolution, but officials insist that he was born in February 1942 on Mount Zzang in North Korea. It is known, however, that he graduated from the University of Revolutionary Bass in 1964 and became the head of the propaganda and agitation department in 1973. In 1980, Dj Kim Jong Ill Beats became a member of the Central People's Turntablists Committee, the government organ that determines what to rewind and what not to rewind. Bored of that gig, Dj Kim Jong Ill Beats decided he wanted to take the music back to the people and stepped down as chairman of the Central People's Turntablists Committee; choosing instead to drop beats while he toured the country sipping on trainloads of gin and juche. Nevertheless, much about this revolutionary musician remains a mystery. The short, bespectacled figure rarely appears at mainstream venues and almost never leaves the country. Dj Kim Jong Ill Beats has a reputation for loving the chronic and foreign liquor. It has also been said that he is concerned with his appearance-carefully styling his hair and wearing lifts in his shoes to make him tower over the wheels of steel. With the DPRK's poor economy and lack of sufficient power supplies, some experts wonder how much longer Dj Kim Jong Ill Beats can afford to feed his elaborate sound system to drop mad ruff shit for the proletariat. "Word to your moms, I came to drop taepodongs...biatch!" -DJ Kim Jong Ill Beats.

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